Intro

      Hey, my name is Mary Blenke. I'm a sophomore at the University of South Florida, Barista at Starbucks, and core member of the Tessera Youth ministry at the Cathedral of St. Jude the Apostle.
     Let me backtrack really quick. When I was born, I was baptized Catholic. From then on I never really practiced. Sure, my parents and I (well, mostly my mom) went to mass almost every Sunday. But hey, going to mass didn't exactly mean going to mass (as the teens in my youth group like to say). All it meant was spending an hour every Sunday where I didn't want to be. This lasted until my freshman year of high school.
     Upon trying out for the volleyball team, I met a girl that went to youth group. She was from a different Catholic middle school than I knew her briefly from school dances and competitive sports. We got called back, but neither of us made it much farther, as volleyball players that is. We quickly became friends and soon, she invited me to youth group. My first trip was to the March for Life in 2007. The fellowship, love, and community I felt made my hear jump. I knew I was being called to something greater.
     For the next semester I immersed myself in the idea of youth ministry. I loved Sundays because it meant I could go to youth group and meet new people. We met our new youth minister and with it our new program; Life Teen. I wasn't sold.
     That summer, I went to my first "retreat". Steubenville Atlanta, Matt Maher, and my youth group friends. It was a blast. I wasn't ready. I had no idea what faith was, I had an idea of what fun was. Hanging out with people who (I thought) had my same morals. It was a blast, but I felt something more. I was being called to something greater.
     For the next few months my life was nice. I started pining for a relationship with the Lord. I started feeling the way he was pursuing. I yearned for it, but I just didn't know. I felt lonely, I felt nothing from the Lord, I felt as though I was being called for more, but what? I felt nothing.
     My loneliness Sophomore year left my heart feeling empty. I filled it with a guy, and not the best one. The next two years I spent under his reign instead of His. My demeanor got sadder and sadder as I allowed my heart to be pulled away from the Lord. I let this guy have my heart, and my life. I said no to what I thought I was being called too, and yes to what was leading me away. The next two years, I spent under the supervision of my boyfriend. I was emotionally and physically abused daily. I figured I wasn't good enough for more. I figured I just wasn't good enough for the Lord anymore.
     The summer of 2009 came quickly (actually, really slowly. I was miserable). Anyways, I went to a Life Teen summer camp. That week changed my life.

Welcome to it.